


maybe next time

by kimbyunjeon



Category: EXO (Band)
Genre: M/M
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2013-09-23
Updated: 2013-09-23
Packaged: 2018-08-18 16:21:14
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Major Character Death
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,508
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/8168299
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/kimbyunjeon/pseuds/kimbyunjeon
Summary: Baekhyun thinks many things can wait till later, but his best friend says otherwise. Chanyeol thinks that it's always important to seize the moment. It's funny really, how the both of them became best friends when others would say they were complete polar opposites.





	

**Author's Note:**

> title inspired by kris' famous line 'maybe next time'
> 
> imported from LJ

Time flies faster than one can imagine; the ticking of the clock seems endless, but one day it will stop its motion, and remain still.

*

Baekhyun thinks many things can wait till later, but his best friend says otherwise. Chanyeol thinks that it's always important to seize the moment. It's funny really, how the both of them became best friends when others would say they were complete polar opposites.

Baekhyun is soft-spoken, hardworking, punctual, and it always seems like he never has any presence despite his really good character traits compared to the rest of the class. He likes keeping a low profile. The only time people actually started acknowledging his presence was when he was forced to sit next to Chanyeol; their homeroom teacher having high hopes that perhaps the best student in class would be able to change the worst.

Chanyeol is the fun type- making a nuisance in class, never-ending chattering, copying notes and solutions from everyone else, and always arriving seconds before the school bell rings. A complete legend among students, a mystery to the teachers. He somehow gets away with everything, which seemed pretty miraculous for his new best friend - Baekhyun.

The first few weeks were awkward for the both of them, but music had brought both of them together, becoming the common interest they share. When they're both listening to music, Chanyeol would sit in silence, absorbed in the melody that blasts in his ears, and Baekhyun sometimes appreciates that silence, foot tapping along to the rhythm. Sometimes they recommend each other songs, even though their taste in music are vastly different. Baekhyun likes ballads as well as R&B, while Chanyeol listens to pop, especially those with a lot of rap.

One of the reasons why Chanyeol and Baekhyun get along is how Baekhyun is always okay with being the listener. Chanyeol complains about homework, talks about the weather, the food he ate in the morning, his sister, his pet goldfish, the latest hits, the places he'd want to go, his plans on going for adventures. Baekhyun listens to everything, once in a while adding in his own personal opinion, and waits till Chanyeol is finished talking. To be honest, Baekhyun didn't quite like talking, but it was inevitable when sitting with Chanyeol, who questions him non-stop.

Eventually he got tired of listening.

In Chanyeol’s opinion, Baekhyun has potential in getting a good career, a bright future, judging by his grades and attitude, but the one thing he lacks is confidence. He is afraid to mix new friends, go to new places(his house being his only sanctuary), try new things, and each time someone offers him something he shoots back the same three words, which is probably the only phrase he ever says on a daily basis - maybe next time. It's not just someone he rejects, it's anyone, and everyone.

It is one particular afternoon when Chanyeol actually explodes.

"Again, Baekhyun? Life is too short for you to always say 'later', or 'next time', why can't you just say 'Sure, alright.' for once?"

"Sorry, I really can't go today. I'm sure there is another time.""You always say that," Chanyeol sighs, "remind me why you are my best friend again."

"Because I'm the only person who can bear with all your nonsense."

Chanyeol laughs. He admits it.

"It's my last birthday in high school though, and I was hoping you would finally make it. I guess I was wrong. You've never made it to any of my birthday parties."

Truthfully, Baekhyun doesn't like being around too many people. Even school was hard to bear with. He tries not to feel bad about it.

"I'll try to go on your 21st birthday." He replies, and notices how Chanyeol's mouth twitches when he used the word 'try'.

Chanyeol lets out a dry laugh.

"If we make it there that is."

*

Chanyeol is dying. He knows it, because the throbbing in his head is worse than usual, his arms twitch in the most uncomfortable way ever, and sometimes, fuck, he sees two images of him in the mirror. Of course, it's only one of him when he squints hard enough. Chanyeol staggers out of the bathroom, and plops down on his bed, staring up at the ceiling that seems to go tilted-

Chanyeol reaches for his phone, and doesn't even bother scrolling through his contacts; he knows the number by heart. His thumbs hovers over the 'Call' button, hesitating for a moment. Chanyeol assumes that Baekhyun is back at home, writing his new novel and probably telling everyone else 'maybe next time'. He has been missing out so much in his life because of these three simple words, and Chanyeol finds that somewhat pitiful. He probably shouldn't be bothering him, but he thinks Baekhyun ought to know about it.

He calls.

"Yes?" Baekhyun's voice echoes, and there is the faint sound of a whirring ceiling fan, and Chanyeol assumes that Baekhyun has put him on loudspeaker.

"Hey, buddy."

"Oh, hey Chanyeol. What's up?"

"No, just wanted to talk to you." Chanyeol finds himself unable to bring up the situation because he knows Baekhyun is busy and he's not like before, always there to listen.

"Is it anything important? 'Cause I'm busy finishing this novel, the deadline is next week and it means a lot to me. So maybe-"

"Yeah, sure. Next time."

He ends the call before Baekhyun does.

For soft-spoken Baekhyun, writing novels was his life, the only way he can portray emotion and convey messages without having to speak aloud. Chanyeol thought that life was all about spending it, to not let it go to waste, to not live in regret because you missed out on something. Chanyeol thinks that Baekhyun missing out on Chanyeol is the worst decision made.

Sometimes he wonders if Baekhyun is really his best friend. Sure enough, back in high school, Baekhyun is always there; they were inseparable. Now they were drifting apart, Baekhyun busying himself with novels, Chanyeol off to find adventure- but now, he was dying, and Baekhyun wasn't here to hear Chanyeol ramble about how he didn't want to die. He'd be lying if he said he didn't miss the Baekhyun, because every single fibre of his being is dying and falling apart; as well as his heart.

*

Two more weeks till Chanyeol’s life ends, according to his doctor who repeatedly advices him to go for surgery. He decides on counting down to his demise, seeing how he doesn't have enough money to pay for surgery expenses. A part of him doesn't really mind anymore; he's done almost everything he wanted to do.

He ponders on getting Baekhyun out from his hide hole to tell him about the news. He really ought to tell him, even if he's busy, because if Chanyeol were to just leave without telling Baekhyun, he would feel bad even if he really shouldn't, since it was never really his fault to begin with. He doesn't blame Baekhyun either.

"Hey, I need to talk to you, face to face. Be at the coffee shop next to high school at 1pm sharp. It's important." Chanyeol leaves a message when Baekhyun doesn't pick up his phone.

Chanyeol waits at the coffee shop, and to his surprise and delight, Baekhyun makes it. Baekhyun is obviously tired, but smiles when he sees Chanyeol, taking a moment to notice the small details on Chanyeol that changed.

"Wow, it's only been a few months since we last met and you look thinner," a pause, "older too, what exactly have you been doing?" Baekhyun starts with a comfortable conversation, not knowing what was coming for him.

"I've been dying," Chanyeol says truthfully, but perhaps his tone wasn't convincing enough.

There was no point in being like Baekhyun, always pushing things till later, Chanyeol thought.

"I see you still like joking around. You must have been enjoying life after high school, going on adventures and all. So hurry, enlighten me."

Chanyeol noticed that Baekhyun talks more. Maybe Baekhyun missed him too.

"I stopped two months ago." He intended on elaborating, but something dies in his throat.

"Why?" Baekhyun was obviously shocked.

"Like I said, I'm dying. There's a tumor in my brain."

"Come on now, don't joke to me like that-" Baekhyun' voice wavers slightly.

"I'm not lying. I told you, life doesn't go on forever. There won't be enough 'maybe next time's for you to say. Before you know it, life ends."

Tears unknowingly spring to Baekhyun's eyes.

"Go for surgery."

Chanyeol wonders if the reason he can't see Baekhyun all too well is because of his faulty vision or because he is crying.

"Too expensive."

He guesses the latter because tears are starting to roll down his cheek.

"Do something at least!" Baekhyun rages.

Chanyeol forces a smile, wiping away his tears.

"Maybe next time," he jokes, giving Baekhyun a taste of his own medicine.

How he had beared those three stupid words for the past few years, he didn't know.

Baekhyun clenches his fist and sobs. He knows what Chanyeol is trying to say. It was all his fault, for not spending enough time with Chanyeol, being the worst 'best friend' ever. How contradicting. He demands Chanyeol to do something, but he himself does nothing. At this point, who is he to say that to Chanyeol?

"I'm sorry," he chokes.

"Just remember to make it to my funeral." Chanyeol jokes again, because there's no point in being upset anymore.

Baekhyun kicks him in the shins and suppresses another sob.

"Let's go do all the things you like." Baekhyun stands up, taking a look at his friend's fragile image, and swears to remember that face forever.

*

It's amazing how Chanyeol had broke through his doctor's expectation. Two weeks became a month, but that was all God could offer. Nevertheless, Baekhyun was grateful for it, and had taken more time out of his work for Chanyeol, whose vision started to get worse each day, and he often had seizures and headaches that sent him collapsing in Baekhyun's arms. Usually they both end up on the floor because little Baekhyun never could support the weight of giant Chanyeol.

In that one month, many memories were made. Hearts were shattered but memories will remain, and there are no regrets. Chanyeol tells Baekhyun about China, about London, Paris, Thailand, Japan, his adventures that always seemed thrilling and remarkable. Baekhyun listens, because one day he'll not be able to hear the loud booming voice of Chanyeol that always made his heart skip a beat. At night, they would sit together at Chanyeol's balcony to watch the stars (Baekhyun swatting away mosquitoes and Chanyeol laughing), and Chanyeol would sneakily wrap his arms around petite Baekhyun only to watch him squirm and struggle his way out, which made Chanyeol hug him tighter.

Chanyeol kisses Baekhyun's forehead on his supposed last day on Earth, making Baekhyun blush and spit incoherent sentences, his heart thumping louder than Chanyeol's laughs. Chanyeol earns a smack on the arm the next morning (he was surprised he hasn't died yet) from Baekhyun whose face was streaked with tears because Chanyeol was still alive. Chanyeol kisses Baekhyun's tears away, and is happy when Baekhyun doesn't shove him off the bed.Those three words have not been heard for quite some time. Chanyeol never wants to hear it. He hears a new set of three words though.

"I love you," Baekhyun says, kissing Chanyeol's neck (he can only reach so far while standing) and immediately Chanyeol bends down to shower Baekhyun with a hundred more kisses everywhere.

Baekhyun doesn't know when Chanyeol will leave, so he takes every opportunity he can get to hug Chanyeol. because kissing Chanyeol was never easy for Baekhyun. Chanyeol is always able to surprise Baekhyun with sudden kisses, but Baekhyun can never do the same. He blames Chanyeol for having good genes.

"Let's make a deal," he says one night, curled next to Chanyeol. "Our height difference is 10cm, so everytime we kiss, you bend down 5cm, and I will stretch up 5cm, so both of us can equally suffer. Also, you won't be able to give me surprise kisses that way." Chanyeol grins and agrees. This time, they are sitting though, so Baekhyun kisses Chanyeol on the nose before Chanyeol can react.

*

There is a week where things start to fall apart. Chanyeol gets headaches several times a day, he never feels like getting up from his bed, and he only wants to sleep forever. Baekhyun's book is soon to be published and he has to prepare for his upcoming book event. It is during these last moments when Chanyeol feels like everything is slipping away from him, and even though before this he said he had no regrets, he doesn't want to leave. He doesn't want to leave Baekhyun.

He doesn't regret confessing his love for Baekhyun though.

He doesn't regret lying beneath the stars with Baekhyun on his balcony.

He doesn't regret giving Baekhyun surprise kisses.

He doesn't regret cuddling Baekhyun and nuzzling his face in said boy's hair.

He doesn't regret anything that is Baekhyun.

Chanyeol feels himself dying. It's a stronger feeling this time, as if he knows that his time is up. Everything is a blur, but he knows he is happy, because he has Baekhyun.

Chanyeol has a tumor in his brain, but he has Baekhyun in his heart.

Chanyeol hears Baekhyun's voice ringing in his ears, but his vision is nothing but a swirl of black and white. He feels life slipping away, strength leaving his body. His mind goes alert at three familiar words before going off again. By then, Baekhyun is seen clutching on to a pale Chanyeol, screaming hysterically. Chanyeol doesn't wake up to that, but at least he heard those last words.

Maybe next time, we'll be together again.

*

Chanyeol’s funeral was a happy one. Although many were sad, they were glad that he did all the things he wanted to lived a happy life. His parents were awfully sad, but they went along with fate, knowing that God has his purposes, and found God's grace in granting him an extra two weeks.

Baekhyun attends the funeral, even though his second book release event is in half an hour. Chanyeol’s mother spots him, and bursts into tears once Baekhyun's eyes meet with hers. She hugs Baekhyun, who tries his best not to cry and only bites his lip. Chanyeol's mother pulls out a small letter from her pocket, placing it carefully in Baekhyun's hands.

"He said to only give you this when he's gone."

Baekhyun opens the letter, and takes a peek before pulling the contents out. Inside were pictures of both of them during their high school days. There was also a card, with drawings from Chanyeol on the front page. Baekhyun forces himself to flip to the next page without crying.

_Remember, time waits for no one._

_No more 'maybe next time's; only 'I love you's._  
  
_I love you, Byun Baek._  
  
  

**Author's Note:**

> I'm drowning in my own feels I have nothing to say to all of you except for a big thank you for reading this <3


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